So, here's what they had to say...
If you're a parent living with small children, you may often feel like you're
invisible to your kids. After spending a day cajoling, reasoning, threatening and even screaming in an attempt to get your kids to behave, you may feel as if they never
listen to you, much less respond. But all that talking is precisely the problem. If you
feel like you're invisible, you're probably way too audible. When it comes to
discipline, silence often speaks louder than words.
Many parents complicate the job of discipline by setting for themselves two goals instead of just one. Their first goal is to get the kids to do what they're supposed to do, which is
fine. But when kids don't respond right away, many parents add a second
goal: getting the youngsters to accept, agree with, or even like the
discipline. So Mom and Dad start reasoning, lecturing and explaining.
ONE EXPLANATION IS FINE
All this extra talking accomplishes only two things—both of them bad.
First, it aggravates the kids, and second, it says to the children that they
really don't have to behave unless you can give them four or five reasons
why they should.
One explanation is fine. But the mistake many parents make is trying to
reason with their kids as if they were "little adults," and too often adult logic does not impress or motivate young children. Once you say "No" to an
obnoxious behavior, you should save your breath. Further pleading will
irritate you more and give the child a chance to continue the battle— and