When We First Met: We Never Knew

Michael,

When we first met, we never knew...

...we would design and renovate houses together.
Better yet, you never knew I'd want to design and renovate more than one house together. 
We never knew we would have 3 kids by age 30.
We never knew that our children would be best friends and fight so much. (age 2 can be very difficult to work with!)
I never knew you would bake more chocolate chip cookies than Chips Ahoy.
You never knew (but only hoped) that I'd enjoy matching your bike socks.
You never knew that you could care more about hanging out with our family than going on a group ride.
I never knew what it looked like to dine on a dime, and make magic come out of the cupboards.

We never knew that going out to dinner together, just the two of us, would be a well sought luxury.

We never knew what was in store. In seasons of abundance and seasons of drought, I'm so thankful to be in the midst of learning what we never knew.

P.S. I was just wondering if in 20 years I'll be saying things like...

You never knew how gratified you would feel to bring me coffee in bed each morning.
We never knew how much we would enjoy our summer getaways to France.
We never knew that our small children would make such wonderful adults.
We never knew, in our 30's that when we waited so long to buy that "dream" house, that what really mattered was the journey...the dreaming...the exhaustion...the patience...and realizing that having each other is what matters most. And by golly, we can even make a run-of-the-mill shirtwaist house cool with a little time and money.

I really hope those summer getaways really happen.

Love,

Kris

photo.

Happy Birthday: To You (and me)

Born on the same day, you and me. Thirty years of life, ten together. Our life together is better and sometimes harder and often more wonderful than I ever could have imagined.  Life together, under God's provision, is rich and full. I love you.

(As I type Hensley has me putting on a birthday hat and is singing "Happy Birthday To You!" Tegegne said he is going to make me a card that says, "I will listen to you."
And Fields woke me before dawn to say Happy Birthday!

Here's a sweet pic of you and your pop thirty some years ago...

Can't wait for our special night out on the town! Thanks to our free babysitters Micah and Taryn and Eric and Erica! Tag team. The kids are going to have a fun night too!

P.S. I'm reading this book and am soooo loving it. 

Your Parents: Telling Our Story

Dear Children,

Remember us saying that "We love because He first loved us?" (Meaning God loved us, and now we are able to love one another.) Well, it's kinda the same concept with your dad and I. We love you, but we loved each other first. When we fell in love, we didn't even know that you were in store. Our love for you is rooted and grounded in the fact that we love each other. We have come to realize that in our family, when we love each other well, it rubs off on you guys. Our marriage is the core of our family. Your dad and I must remember to not only show you how we are in love (give a smooch when you're looking, hold hands, etc), but to also tell you our love story. The more you know, the more confident you will feel...

So let me begin the journey of telling...
Your dad and I started dating in 2002. We fell in love after we got to know each other on San Diego Summer Project with Campus Crusade for Christ. We were sophomores in college. Your dad was the goofiest guy I had ever met. He made me laugh like no other. During that time he loved many things (mountain biking, pottery, glass blowing, French...) and the best thing was the he loved God. Having that in common was good news to me, because I loved God too. That was the most important thing. Then I got lucky when he picked me to be in his category of what to love.

We dated, he proposed (got down on his knee and asked me to be his wife (meaning his love just turned from temporary to forever, big gulp)), and we got married. We had many special friends who were a part of our journey, and several of them stood by us on our wedding day.

There will be more telling of our story, more details down the road. But for now I want to tell you that we fell in love, we were in love, we are now in love, and we will be in all our days to come.

Your dad and I were laughing the other day about how different our love looks now. We have lots of responsibilities as grownups and parents, which can be hard sometimes. It's good though, because we are learning what love looks like when things are hard, when it's been a long day, and when we are plum worn out. We have come a long way. We know each other much better than when we dated. That makes our love deeper.

So, what type of person do you want to fall in love with? We don't want to hear any of your responses until you are 18 please. Tegegne Dena...

Stay tuned for more exciting talk on mom and dad's love story...

Person: A-Lity

Are you a day dreamer? Or does daydreaming frighten you because it often sends security right out the door? Or maybe you need to understand everything before a grand idea can come about. Does daydreaming seem like a waste of time because you are motivated by productivity and success?


Michael learned quickly that I love change, daydream often, get carried away, and get reeled back in (by him!), and we continue on. I am an adventurer. Motivated by the need to be happy and plan enjoyable activities, to contribute to the world, and to avoid suffering and pain. 


Do you feel like you know yourself and the personalities of those around you? It was so good for me to realize that just because I constantly want to plan enjoyable activities, doesn't mean everyone else wants to attend them! It is quite good to have peaceful evenings at home.


Being married, I find it so helpful when I consider Michael's personality along with my own as we do life together. Then there is our children's personalities. We are really seeing Tegegne's come forth lately! Michael noted that it's so interesting that we do not know the genes or personalities of his birth parents. He realized this as he sees Hensley do things just as he did at her age. 


I must take time to stop and think. 


Kristyn


(These thoughts were empowered by the Enneagram. photo.) 

Tag Team: Back Again

Not many things in life are more satisfying, more rich, more trying and tough, more full of hope and life than the sweet sweet bond of marriage. 

God is doing a good work in Michael and I, showing us that life together can be way good when we tap into the rich source of life in Jesus. I'd say getting through tough times isn't easy, but afterwards there is a new perspective, a deeper understanding, and enduring love. 

Parenthood has tried us the most, and brought us deep joy. Tonight we had a few simple moments that made us glad. Tegegne has a new favorite song, "You Make Beautiful Things" and he was singing it with all his heart in the back seat. And he then said, "God made us out of the dust!" On the way home from visiting a friend, Hensley was crying a sleepy cry. Often we are not excited to hear this, but tonight Michael pointed out the sweet sound of life coming through her little cry. We were comparing it to the first time we heard her cry. Pulled in the drive and did the usual, one-to-one carry the kids to bed routine, but again Michael pointed out how sweet it was. Sweet to have our children rest in our arms and trust us to carry them to their cozy beds and wish them a good night. 

Doing these things together, with Michael, makes all the difference. 

Tag team, back again.

Love,

Kristyn

P.S. (There ya go, Jacob and Nickie, a line item or two for your "pro's" list!) 

Valentines Day: And Take Out

valentine.

It's Valentines Day!  Michael and I are ordering Chinese take-out to enjoy with candlelight after we put the kids to bed. 


Hope you feel loved today!


Kristyn

Conversations: Tegegne

Photo credit.

Mom: Criss, cross, applesauce. Make a loop, wrap around, pull through...(I'm trying to make up a song while tying Tegegne's shoe slowly...He reaches in, eager to gain shoe-tying-independence and pulls the loops tightly!
Tegegne: Mom, what kind of college am I going to go to?
(As if tying his shoe will get him there...baby steps...)


T: Hensley, you've gotta dwive wight on the woad...get out of my garden!...we are fighting...(Hensley, you really do like tumbling around with your bro...and when you don't like it you b-line out of the room with your mad crawling skills. 


M: Tegegne, can you carry this (a small humidifier) to our sleeping porch? 
T: Sure...(he picks it up, grunting with Hensley crawling behind him)
M: Hensley, don't bother Tegegne while he's doing his job. (He took a break, sitting the humidifier on the floor.)
T: It's okay mom! She can bother it. She can touch my job.
+++++


Oh kids. They say funny things and keep the little things in life enjoyable. It is also, along with marriage, one of the hardest jobs I signed up for. But I love it. Marriage too. Phew, so good and so hard all at once. Well, not really all at once. Thanks be to God.


Speaking of marriage. Had a wonderful time with that dear young man I call my husband tonight. Our first date night in a while. We enjoyed Extra Virgin's Happy Hour, and hope to get back there sooner than later. I like that spot, a lot. 


And lastly I should be working. I know...on our first date night in months I'm pulling a close-to-all-nighter to do one of my interior design jobs. Always takes longer than I hope, but its all good. I love it. And of course, I found time to blog instead of get my work done. 


Good night!


(Stole Michael's The Dark Chocolate Lovers Chocolate Bar (85% dark!) to get me going!)


Love,


Kristyn and Mom and Wife

Friendship: A Gift

The Gift of Friendship

Friendship is one of the greatest gifts a human being can receive. It is a bond beyond common goals, common interests, or common histories. It is a bond stronger than sexual union can create, deeper than a shared fate can solidify, and even more intimate than the bonds of marriage or community. Friendship is being with the other in joy and sorrow, even when we cannot increase the joy or decrease the sorrow. It is a unity of souls that gives nobility and sincerity to love. Friendship makes all of life shine brightly. Blessed are those who lay down their lives for their friends.

by Henri Nouwen

photo source.

Taryn and Micah: Got Married!

What a joyous day it was on Saturday! Taryn and Micah had the most beautiful marriage ceremony with a special salt covenant, followed by a feast and ridiculously fun dance party! 

More photos to come.

(P.S. I'm part time mom and part time designer today and tomorrow. Working on a few 3D renderings and I'm totally enjoying it.)

Nothing Beats It

The Perfect Chocolate Chip Cookie

Nothing beats late nights with Michael in the kitchen, slowly enjoying his delectable chocolate chip cookies.  Seriously. I usually scoop them off the hot pan with my fingers because I can't wait for them to cool. Ummmm. With a cold glass of milk in a mason jar of course. A good time to chat, which currently means that I am learning a lot about The Tour. I love it. I can even sort of hold a conversation about The Tour these days because I've been a good listener. 

Nothing beats it. Except the early morning cookie that didn't get eaten the night before. Or the late night cookies that he promised to make with our awesome friends in Austin, Texas this weekend! We are taking a last minute trip to Austin, and we cannot wait to explore the city but especially spend time with our friends. Michael and Johnny G go way back and they are ridiculous together. Tanya and I usually can't stop laughing. And we've both become parents since we've hung out last. We are in for quite a weekend. 

Sorry I'm having weekend talk and it's only Wednesday.

Hopefully yours will come sooner than you know it!

Relationships + Marriage: The Enneagram

Did you read the cartoon above? I LOVE it. It's SO true. Especially when in a large group, right? Everyone is visiting, but we often have a thought trailing in the back of our minds. I am giddy and excited about the Enneagram, which is an in-depth study on personalities. For now, I'm sticking with a simplified book (below) which I just ordered a copy of. 

As I visit with other wives I usually bring this book up, as there are several great things I learned about my hubby that has helped our marriage a ton. I've heard it said so often, "try to think of where they are coming from..." but if I don't know the voice in my husband's head, how can I possibly know how to think like him. Personalities are different.  Relationships take work. And when one needs advice it's often humbling or expensive to seek professional counseling. I'm way excited for my copy to come in the mail and I'll try to share tidbits in hopes to get you interested in the topic!

The Enneagram Made Easy, Co-Authored by Elizabeth Wagele and Renee Baron 

Eventually I'll look into the more-in-depth and Christian perspective from Richard Rohr.

Talk soon,

Kristyn 

Home When I'm With You

Michael Ababayeh Daddy Jones, I made this video for you with the song titled Home by Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeroes. I've been noticing that absence does make the heart grow fonder, as I am thinking of you a lot. Loving the lyrics to this song. I'm home when I'm with you. The video just plays half the song, but you can listen to the whole thing here. Enjoy. Can't wait to have you home.

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com